3am

I dont understand my English anymore. yay.
This is the first time I'm last minute-ing my work. Actually technically not that last minute but the group agreed on this time deadline so we have enough time to tidy the ends.
Im talking to myself.
I've never done this before, and its such a panicky feeling I have this lump near my throat that makes me feel like I want to throw up. Eergh.
I am actually a fb stalker now. SHIT. Im the lowest of the low .
Yay, lack of sleep makes me do reckless things that make me more obsessy. fuck me. Stop stalking. argh. I need someone to msn with.
I want my mummy =( If i reread this, i would think i am a looney.
chinese/ canto songs are damn good for late night working. i bet i look damn good now >)
yay, had a nice talk with Mum, Quan and Fay =D rejuvenated.
I feel weak. -_-" and yes Im lala like that.
ok 4pm that was a damn long hour. does time travel slower at night?

loser

some people make more friends in a week than I do in a year. whee

another one

It's really bad how unproductive I am. How am I suppose to do Masters? (mum's idea)
OMG.. argh. fb is not addictive if you have a life but when you have work, fb is your friend. wtfff.
my blog is so not insightful, actually it is insightful, just not intellectual. whee. F.

ass ache

Just realised that my netbook's microsoft office proofreader doesnt work. Stupid. Lots of typos. SHall have to check. Not like I dont but, more of a reason not to slap it together and call it a day.
I am cursed with bad chair, table combo's. My body aches now.
Oh and Im not very far into my report. shez

thoughts

Just visited Evana's blog after forever, wow, very nice now. And profound. Hope everything is oK over there, though I might never know.
hm, cant figure out how to graph this data.

procrasitination

I am in the middle of doing my business plan, then I thought hey, blogging is a great way to fill in the boring bits between work. Cause I usually get distracted or blank half way and start thinking random stuff that i think, hey, i should write it down. so yes, im deep like that.
Was listening to smooth jazz, a bit too sleepy for work i thk. OOH lady gaga playing now.

sad face

Today, our family friend Jason has come to spend the night before travelling to Ipoh to meet his family.
Today, my grandmother joined us for dinner.
At dinner, my dad was talking to Jason about business.
At dinner, my grandma was telling my mum of her friend's brilliant daughter who read books that I read now when she was but a kid.
I feel not good enough. I don't get great grades. I am not special at anything. I wasn't an outstanding kid. I feel that they don't think I'm good enough to be bragged about, instead, they brag about some stranger. I feel that they dont take me seriously to tell me the important stuff. I feel that maybe it's cause I'm a girl.
My dad has never talked to me about what he does or how our family survives.
I thought I was pretty decent, getting good grades, being quick, being a little better at sports. I thought I was good cause I always try to help, looking after my siblings, trying to calm the storms.
I guess being average is never good enough.

I'll get over this, I always get over things.